It starts at an early age. From birth, if anyone’s counting, when a baby begins to interact and bond with those around her. Sweet and peachy, everybody doting on you, life is good. In preschool, things start to get a bit “sticky.” Other kids tug at your hair, swipe your stuff, and if that isn’t enough, they have the nerve to compete with you for the teacher’s attention!
First grade rolls around and next thing you know, “it’s us against them” or worse, “odd girl out.” Suddenly, your apple pie has gone sour. But no one promised you a rose garden, did they? Well, okay, no one except your mother. And of course, Daddy. But he keeps going on about this princess-creature and her kingdom of riches, and about some handsome prince fellow waiting to whisk her away to a life of luxury and adoring attention.
Are you kidding me? “Wake up!” you shout. “These are dragons out here! Fire-breathing, girl-eating – and they mean business!”
Ugh. When will that man listen? During elementary school the lines are drawn, cliques are formed, and you had better be in one less you die at first frost – frosty glare. “You’re not my friend anymore.” Today, anyway. Tomorrow’s a whole new dawn. But cheer up, young lass, middle school awaits you!
Groan. Grunt. Oh, God, please no – not yet! I’m not ready! (This is your parent’s reaction.) You, on the other hand, why this is your time to spread your wings, to blossom! Until some horrid boy comes along and snips your spirit right at the bud. Discouraged, “they” promise things will look up. “Don’t worry, honey, high school will be your time to shine!”
You mean take your revenge… Now free of those insensitive shears, your buds have blossomed, and you have turned into one beautiful flower. “No, I don’t recall your name.” You turn ever so slightly. “No, I won’t go out on a date with you.” And then he pushes. “Not even if you were the last boy on the planet, do you hear?”
Okay, so let’s not go overboard. The boy was only acting like a boy. Which doesn’t change a whole lot with time, but you get the picture. Up, down, back, forth – relationships can change with the wind, it seems.
How does one survive this rollercoaster of nature? Deep roots. And how does one develop deep roots? With lots of love, plenty of sunlight and regular pruning, every young woman will “bloom in time.” Given the proper care and feeding, she will discover who she is and what she’s meant to do with her life. In her time, on her terms.
A solid foundation is key. While much of this comes from factors beyond our control, ie. environmental, cultural, the “gardeners” in charge of tending the garden in which we grow, the rest is up to us. So if you find yourself in a bad spot – move. Re-till the soil. If you’re not getting any sun, break out of from the shade, open your heart to the light of day. Seek wide open spaces, let the wind blow through your hair. Use those deep roots to hold you steady, then dance, sway, live with abandon, love without fear.
Surround yourself with companion plants, good companions — those which naturally promote good absorption and strong growth habits — and you’ll set the stage for a phenomenal harvest!